Burnt Chocolate Stories

I used to say the years fly by like bullets. Then it was weeks. Now it's days. Saturday morning is here again and I've spent a good deal of the time drinking coffee and thinking about what I'd like to post.  Today is Steve's Yartzeit (the one year anniversary of his death according to the Jewish calendar). I lit the candle in his memory and said the prayers. I thought it would be a sad day for me, but in truth, we had over sixty amazing years, a journey that contained dozens of highs and lows. I'm grateful for what we had. The sadness has diminished. In the coming year, I'll light a candle for my parents, my sister Sandy, our son Ben, friends I've lost, because in that moment when the candle is lit, I feel their presence and remember the times we shared.  Steve was a complicated man, but his ability to laugh at himself, not take himself too seriously was one of his best traits. It's one of the things I loved most about him. Steve loved to tell the story ...

There's a belief that if you do something for 21 days in a row, it becomes a habit you'll find difficult to break. This applied to exercise mostly and I don't know if that's true for writing posts, but today is the 21st Saturday that I've written a story and posted it on Burnt Chocolate. So perhaps I've cemented the habit. I do know that writing brings me a great deal of pleasure. And at this stage in my life, that's become an important commodity. Since I moved to Saint John's, I've thought about getting a puppy. Steve and I talked about it and decided it probably wasn't a good idea. When we had Annie, a mixture of German Shepherd and Rottweiler and Emma, a mixture of Black Lab, Sharpie and Staffordshire Terrier (pit bull), we were living in a house and could open the back door and let them run. In an apartment, no matter the weather, walking them outside is a necessity. Then, when Steve moved to the care neighborhood, I thought why not? A puppy ...

Barb and Steve - Engaged in 1963 With Steve gone, I've spent a lot of time, this past year, thinking about my part in our relationship. I always believed he was the driving force behind so much of our lives. I listened to, and loved his favorite music performers like Johnny Cash, Elton John, and Sam Cooke who were some of his favorites. Steve often chose the restaurants, movies, vacation spots. He loved and purchased art and antiques, mineral specimens, netsuke figurines and so much more that I also enjoy. But I made some of the major changes in our lives and he accepted and supported anything and everything I suggested or wanted. I was the one who made the connection between Stephen's job at Look Magazine with my relative's marketing company which later became the focus of his career. After eighteen years, I said "The children are all starting their adventures. I want one too. Let's sell the house in Evanston and move." To which he said, "Ok." One y...