Passages

I think everyone likes to feel needed and valued. I know that's true for me. Not so much when I was a little girl and my mother wanted me to set the table and clean up after dinner with my sisters. After the last bite of dessert, I would escape to the bathroom and hide in there until I was sure the last glass had been put back into the cupboard.

When Steve and I married, we had each other to care for until the first of our five children arrived just seven years apart. I remember carrying an infant with a toddler wrapped around my leg. Part of me loved it and part of me thought I was being swallowed whole. But those years passed way too quickly. Maybe thirty years at most and we were on our own again. 

And now, I am completely alone for the first time in my life. No children, no husband, no house to manage, although my handful of plants need water from time to time. I thought about getting a puppy but Wisconsin winters are not friendly for dog walking. And it would feel like a repeat of those infancy years of caring for another almost constantly. So I put that thought aside. 

But I did have a realization just the other day. The marketing director, Lucia, here at St. John's on the Lake, calls me regularly to show my apartment to a prospective resident as she did just this past week. I have to straighten up the place, make sure the kitchen sink is empty, wipe down the bathroom counter top. But I realized after her request a few days ago, that the prospect gave me a lift, made my day a little brighter. So I wondered why and came to the conclusion that her call made me happy because she needs my help which makes me feel needed and valued. Something everyone needs from time to time, regardless of their age.